We each have the potential to be “amazing
human beings.” It comes down to how you
treat your neighbor and how you treat the ones you love. I know of one wife who raves about her husband’s
kindness and thoughtfulness, because he works hard at “looking out for the little
things.” He will surprise her with
flowers or other “just because” gifts; encourages her to spend time with her
sister who surprises with a visit while he prepares dinner; brings her breakfast in
bed from time to time; but mostly he shows her and tells her how much he adores
her through the tenderness he is not afraid to display. Because he sees
her needs are met, she finds it very easy to meet his.
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| https://www.google.com/search?q=friendship |
While the examples of
“looking out for the little things” described by my friend might not work for
every couple, there are plenty of other ways to demonstrate affection and
love. Holding hands while walking, the
gentle touch of a hand to the face, a look in the eyes, the genuine, consistent
saying of “I love you, can all be examples, and there are many more. Clearly, it is a deliberate effort of one person
to make the other happy and letting them know they are loved.
The idea of
“deliberate effort,” I suggest, also applies to friendships. We each desire extensions of who we are and
often find them in other people. Are we
quick and purposeful about letting other people know how we feel? In our world of perverted ideas regarding
homosexuality, it’s become more difficult to express genuine affection for the
same gender without it being misinterpreted.
We ladies have “girlfriends” which means we have those friends with whom
we “connect.” Guys would loathe the tag
“boyfriend” and I completely understand, yet even guys need to connect with
other guys of similar interests and beliefs.
I always chuckle when
guys meet guys they haven’t seen in a while.
Their opening remark might be something like, “Hey, Ugly!” Women on the other hand would never say that
to another woman, even if they thought it!
It just doesn’t happen. Women are
quick to say something like “You look great!” even if they notice their friend
has put on a few pounds!
As friends, it is as
important to be honest, as in a marriage.
Falseness can destroy a friendship as quick as anything, as can
gossip. Here again it takes effort to
maintain the relationship, and there are as many ways to demonstrate this, as
there are friends! A chat over coffee or
tea, shopping together (sorry guys!), sharing sad times and allowing tears to
flow without judgment, reveling in their success and joys, seeing to needs
during a crisis, just checking on them to make sure they are okay and for me,
the physical display of affection: a hug!
The point is, it is
important in relationships to share what is in your heart that lifts up the
other person. That’s what we are called
to do, Biblically. In a marriage it is
paramount. This is where the “ideal”
relationship should be exemplified. Marriage
along with all other relationships should be a reflection of our relationship
with Christ. Sadly this isn’t always the
case. Our society has demeaned marriage
and Satan is working to see marriage relationships crumble daily. Couples seem to go in their own
direction as Satan works in the mind, filling it with alluring worldly
pleasures, or the other extreme filling the heart with anger and bitterness
which is also hugely destructive.
I would ask that this
week you evaluate your relationships, marital (if it applies), friendships, even
the relationships with your children.
When was the last time you demonstrated “deliberate effort” toward those
you care about? It’s not about money or
material things. You don’t have to spend
a dime. It’s about the heart and showing
affection, love, caring, understanding, warmth, comfort and anything else that
demonstrates the love exemplified through our perfect role model: Jesus. Wouldn’t it be grand if all our relationships
made the Lord smile?
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