Trusting God In New Seasons

  My roles have always been well defined.  I was married to the same man for 51 years.  I was wife, mom to 5 children, then over time grandmother to 17.  Charles was sick for a long time, but he was a fighter and seemed to be able to push through with his faith, medication, his strong beliefs, and come out on the other side.

Only then …he didn’t.  God called him home and he no longer had to fight every day just to survive. 

OUR WORLDS CHANGED

Not only did his world change, but mine did also.  I was numb and walked in a fog for weeks… even several months.  I couldn’t ‘get started’ in my new normal.  I felt disoriented and had a terrible time focusing on anything.  

I did all the ‘regular things’ that my day required, but it was like I was someone else.  I’d lost my purpose.  Even my love of writing seemed so far down a dark pit, retrieving it seemed impossible on most days.

A GLIMMER OF HOPE

Finally….finally, I began to see a glimmer of hope, of light that motivated me enough to keep putting one foot in front of the other with the intention of being in that light again.  I was fortunate because eventually I did find ‘me’ again and even the gift God gave me long ago....to again put thoughts and words on paper.  

But my writing has changed too.  I’m not the same person I was before Charles died.  Oh, certainly, I am the same in many respects.  But perspective has changed.  Meaning and purpose have evolved in ways I wouldn’t have even imagined.  

       Still, I’m not trapped anymore.  I’m not lost in the mire of’ what ifs’ or ‘shoulda’, ‘coulda’ and ‘where did time go? or How am I going to get to where I need to be? or even regrets and wondering if I’d done better as Charles’ advocate with his doctors, might he still be here?

WE ALL MAKE MISTAKES

Mistakes make us feel small and insecure and yet, they are seemingly impossible to escape.  Add these to the negative thoughts we keep replaying in our minds, and it can be downright debilitating.  They can paralyze, create anxiety, anger, bitterness, and stress levels most of us can’t live with!

This is why an intentional mindset, demonstrates how important it is to let go of past regrets and failures.  God urges us to focus on future goals despite the obstacles which rear their ugly heads, in all kinds of ways, and threaten to dissolve our resolve!

GOD IS 'DOING A NEW THING'

God has this unique way of ‘doing a new thing’ in our lives when we are open to the opportunity.  He gives us a promise we can cling to when life has beaten, battered and broken our hearts.  Even before Paul, God said through Isaiah (Is 43:18-19)

       "Forget the former things… See, I am doing a new thing!”  This is powerful when we let go of the ‘former things’ and allow God to fill us with new life and hope.  He’s promising to make a way for us!

My life is once again in a kind of rhythm…. It’s still very different than before Charles passed.  But I have a ‘new vision’, a new excitement in listening to His voice leading me in places I’d never dreamed!

LIFE HAPPENS

I didn’t want my Charles to leave me.   But life happens, —and death is part of life. Now God is going to use this painful event in ways that are still surfacing and totally blowing my mind!  That I could create something special for widows (or others who grieve) is an amazing way to help others while easing my own pain and allow healing.

God is actively creating a ‘new thing’ which continues to ‘spring up’!  It is no less than ‘divine intervention’ at a time when I wondered if I’d ever feel the warm sunshine not only warm my body, but also my soul—and my heart.  

TRUSTING GOD IN HARD TIMES

It’s a wonderful reminder to trust God during uncertain and hard times, even if it doesn’t make sense.  I’ve heard trust described as ‘actionable faith’…to look forward, accept the change, and climb out of the pit of old familiar patterns.  

    Perhaps you too, need to trust God to do 'a new thing' in your life. Be still, and 'know' that He is God!

Photo Credit: Family Roles & Responsibilities 

Photo Credit: A Glimmer Of Hope

Photo Credit: Forgetting the Past and Looking Forward