Hard Decisions

         

        It is hard with young children to explain why Mom and Dad fight all the time and end in separation or divorce.  My own daughter had an experience with a friend of hers while in elementary school.  

          After returning to school following the holidays my daughter asked her friend, “Did you have a nice Christmas?”  Her friend replied, “No.”  “Why?” My daughter responded.  “Cause of Mom,” her friend answered.  Bewildered, my daughter asked, “What did your Mom do?”  Her friend’s response, “She didn’t spend Christmas with Daddy.”   My daughter was horrified and had no clue how to respond!

As adults, we accept this kind pain, despite how difficult, try to deal with it and move on.  It’s different with children.  It is beyond their understanding.  All they understand is their love for both their parents, and their fear of losing one or both.  They often feel responsible, filling them with guilt that isn’t theirs.  

 

It's always interesting, especially over the holidays, watching the Hallmark Christmas movies, which are set to begin again soon.  Several of the movies will deal with the loss of a spouse, but others deal with separation and divorce and the problems it creates for the children.  Obviously, on TV, eventually everything turns out all right, especially with the backdrop of 'Christmas'.  Life isn’t necessarily quite as kind, and it takes some hard decisions to get everything in order.

 

God wants order.  He doesn’t want our lives all mixed up and sad.  The holidays seem to accentuate whatever it is we are going through --- especially when it’s sadness.  God promised to give us guidance, if we ask him.  As adults, when things get tough, we need to seek God’s will in our lives and remember that our decisions not only affect our lives but those around us, including our children, and extended family.  

 

This doesn’t mean that hard decisions won’t still come.  Whether it’s divorce, moving, changing jobs, financial problems, health issues or any number of situations, we need to seek God’s face so that we can handle unpleasant situations not only from an adult perspective, but enable us to guide our children through it, as well.

 

It’s encouraging to know God is “in the house!”  He is our source of strength, every single day, with just a whispered breath crying out to Him.  He is our support who holds us in the palm of His hand.  Life is a continuing cycle and every person is affected in some way by circumstances they hadn’t planned for.  But Christ knows our needs even better than we do.  He knows the beginning from the end and just how things will work out.

 

So, if you are experiencing any kind of change or hardship--regardless of the time of year, give the problem to God.  Begin now; this year, month, week, day and even moment to moment.  Listen for His will and allow him to work out the details.  Do your best in all things, and let Him do the rest!